In Issue 13
“One time I was fast asleep on the couch and I just feel Paul and his gentle touch on my shoulder going, ‘Hey, Jase, wake up. It’s time to wake up, buddy. Wake up.’ And I slowly open my eyes, and Paul is standing there with his dick out. And he just gives me this weird, mischievous smile and walked out of the room.” – Jason Segal talks about working with Paul Rudd on “I Love You Man.” Seems like someone is a method actor.
I spent last weekend in Vegas and one of the highlights was going to Donny & Marie’s show at the fabulous Flamingo Casino and Resort. This is not only the perfect show for this room, it’s the perfect show for all of Vegas. It has everything a great Vegas show needs. In many ways, it feels like the old Donny & Marie variety show from the 70s. They sing together, joke together, joke at each other’s expense and sing some more. There are solo sections for each of the siblings and they prove themselves to be in phenomenal shape both physically and vocally. By the end you’ve had a great time, heard songs you remember fondly and leave with a smile on your face. The Flamingo must be smiling too – the siblings’ six-month contract has been extended to two years! That gives me plenty of time to go back and see it again. Bottom line – go see this show. You’ll have a GREAT time!!
Did you watch the Siegfried and Roy farewell on “20/20”? I talked to some people who were there and they are utterly convinced that Roy was only on stage for the final bow. If you watch the tape, both men are in hooded capes and masks. The alleged Roy hobbles out as if it is a superhuman effort. Even Siegfried doesn’t move much. At the end of the trick Roy briefly (and discretely) walks to the side of the stage, momentarily obstructed by the curtain. Then he comes out for the bow, takes off the mask, and it’s Roy. So, was the whole trick Roy? Was just the bow Roy? Does it matter? Who cares anyway? They raised a lot of money for a good cause, and I guess it shouldn’t matter. But, dammit, you know I want to find out the truth.
I must confess you lesbians are a mystery to me. Case in point – Cat Cora from “Iron Chef America.” She’s just announced that she’s 4-1/2 months pregnant with her third child (a boy). Nothing strange there, except that she’s not pregnant with her own child – she was implanted with one of her girlfriend Jennifer’s fertilized eggs. I am told that this is something lesbian couples do for legal reasons – in fact, the second child that Cat gave birth to was also from one of Jennifer’s eggs. So, who cares? But Jennifer is ALSO pregnant – and due next month! And no one knows who the mother of that kid is, because Jen was implanted with her own fertilized eggs AND Cat’s! The only definite is that all of these kids have the same dad – both ladies used the same anonymous sperm donor. And you people thought the Octomom was wacky? This sounds like a very special episode of “Maury”!
Have you been watching Joan and Melissa Rivers on “Celebrity Apprentice”? Well, here’s something you didn’t know about the Rivers family: when Missy and ex-hubby John Endicott divorced he had it written into the divorce agreement that Mommie Dearest would not include him in her stage act! He’s smarter than he looks…
A flurry of fans went to see that abysmal Jonas Brothers 3-D movie (what is wrong with you?). Apparently, there’s a scene when the boys rush off stage to do a quick change and are shirtless. Since a source sent me the video, you can skip the theatre and just enjoy it at BillyMasters.com (although I warn you – we’re not in 3-D!).
Without any provocation, some nude photos of Rick Schroder arrived in my inbox. In the 1994 made-for-TV flick “Texas” there was a skinny dipping scene where Schroder exposes his little Ricky. Someone sent us the enhanced stills which are mighty hot indeed. Check ’em out at BillyMasters.com.
Our “Ask Billy” question is from Tyler in Baltimore: “I heard that Matt Dallas and Jonathan Bennett are dating. Is this true? Are they both gay?î If they’re dating, they must be gay…right? They WERE dating months ago – there’s a photo of them together at a Halloween party that started the rumors. I’m told it was never anything serious. They’re both currently single.
When I can squeeze in a few naked celebs and a quick “Ask Billy” question, it’s definitely time to end yet another column. I didn’t even get to tell you about Pamela Anderson’s deformed nipple popping out at the Vivienne Westwood fashion show in Paris, or Britney stopping a concert to exclaim, “My pu**y is hanging out!” I’ll post those as extras on BillyMasters.com – the site that caters to everyone!