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“Would you like some watermelon juice? It’s low-calorie. I’m trying to lose a little weight.” – Barbra Streisand offers an interviewer refreshment. Now, let me get this straight – watermelon juice? Does Tropicana make that or does it come in crystals? Knowing Babs, her watermelon is probably fresh-squeezed every morning by James.

 

 

“Would you like some watermelon juice? It’s low-calorie. I’m trying to lose a little weight.” – Barbra Streisand offers an interviewer refreshment. Now, let me get this straight – watermelon juice? Does Tropicana make that or does it come in crystals? Knowing Babs, her watermelon is probably fresh-squeezed every morning by James.

 

Since it’s time for me to get my fall highlights (or possibly experiment with Balayage), I’m in the mood to discuss blonds. One of my favorite blonds is Belinda Carlisle. Last September I told you that Belinda would be playing ice queen Velma Von Tussle in the Broadway production of “Hairspray.” The show closed before that could happen. Babe really wanted to play the part so now, a year later, I’m thrilled to announce that she’ll join the London production starting on October 26th. I’m gonna book my trip FAST!

When I met Derek Hough from “Dancing with the Stars” I was sure he was gay…and I mean that as a compliment. Hot little body, frosted hair, overly tanned skin – it was almost like looking in a mirror, albeit one in a funhouse! Of course Derek was dating Shannon Elizabeth, who we all know has never met a gay man she didn’t like. When the couple split, the Enquirer decided to turn speculation into fact. According to the rag, the schism was caused by his sexuality – or, rather, the wagging tongues. Allegedly Shannon never believed the rumors, but they took a toll on her. I, for one, refuse to believe it. At least I refuse to believe it was only a rumor!

 

Elsewhere in the world of reality television, fans of Scott Herman from “Real World: Brooklyn” can’t get enough of the abs-olutely gorgeous fitness model. We’ve seen pretty much every inch of him (except the most important inches, but we’re getting closer). The hottie has been filming video vignettes for fans which we’re running on our website. The most recent one raised more than our eyebrows. It’s direct from his shower and he talks about the importance of getting a close shave on his torso when prepping for a fitness photo shoot. “Now, you have to be really careful because you don’t want to cut your nipples, because that hurts….a lot! I’ve done it once or twice. It hurts like a bitch if you cut it.” Riveting. Not the brightest bulb, but he does look hot in the shower.

 

Since this is going to keep coming up, I have to make a decision – do I start calling Trevor Neubauer by his Trevor Donovan moniker? In truth, when he was born in 1978 he was called Trevor Donovan Neubauer. As a model he didn’t put much thought into a stage name. Clad in undies for such brands as A&F, Jockey and Calvin Klein, his name wasn’t so important. In 2007 he took a shot at “acting” on “Days of our Lives” and decided to become Trevor Donovan. Who cares? He’s gorgeous, bleached blond (I’m seeing a trend) and shaved within an inch of his life (the trend continues). He joins the cast of “90210” playing Teddy Montgomery, who he calls “a new kid at West Beverly High.” Playing a high school student sounds like quite an acting challenge for this 31-year-old! I haven’t heard such ridiculous casting since…well, since the original “90210” was on FOX! Be that as it may, the paparazzi caught him walking along the beach with his wet suit rolled down below his waist. The drool-worthy pics can be found on BillyMasters.com.

 

Our “Ask Billy” question follows the natural progression of this column. Ron in Orlando asks: “Did you see ‘The Ugly Truth’? In one scene, Eric Winter is naked. Aside from his hot ass, I swear you could see his [****].”

 

I must confess that it takes a lot for me to go to a Katherine Heigl movie, but the promise of every angle of Eric Winter tempted me to get off my ass and check out his. Certainly Eric Winter is fabulous to look at from the waist up. I remember touching that very torso in Kathy Griffin’s kitchen…but that’s another story for another column. In “The Ugly Truth” Winter’s character has just gotten out of the shower, clad only in a towel, and he’s flossing when Heigl, the first lady of film, falls out of a tree holding her kitty! I’m not making this up, you know. Eric dashes out of the house to help her, the towel goes flying, and there is his ass. But if you focus on that, you’ll miss the very brief glimpse of his penis. Well, you won’t miss it after I post the pictures…

 

Billy Masters can take your questions at Billy@BillyMasters.com and promises to get back to you before Luke Perry gets cast as Trevor’s younger brother!   Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

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