“They still don’t understand why I didn’t win. I go, ‘Guys! Seriously?’ They go, ‘No, mommy. You were the best.’ They still insist. That’s love.” – Kate Gosselin tells “Access Hollywood” how shocked her kids were when she didn’t win “Dancing with the Stars.” Apparently the delusional gene is hereditary.





“They still don’t understand why I didn’t win. I go, ‘Guys! Seriously?’ They go, ‘No, mommy. You were the best.’ They still insist. That’s love.” – Kate Gosselin tells “Access Hollywood” how shocked her kids were when she didn’t win “Dancing with the Stars.” Apparently the delusional gene is hereditary.

Phase one of my European adventure has come to an end, but even overseas I heard about Miley Cyrus’ ex-boy toy Justin Gaston. The sexy stud has posed nude for PETA, alongside his “If I Can Dream” co-stars Giglianne Braga and Ben Elliott. I’m not one to gush, but WOW! It’s almost enough to make me watch this direct-to-Hulu reality web series (almost, but not quite). And forget about Justin for a sec – especially since he left the show to hit the road as Kris Allen’s opening act. Ben Elliott. Lordy, lordy! Just wait ‘til you see him. Of course, we’ve seen Justin before (including his penis in some see-through undies). Now we have another excuse to run those pics – and the new ones.

People involved with “90210” have confirmed that one of the male characters will be coming out. Who will it be? The frontrunners (so to speak) are played by Matt Lanter, Michael Steger and Trevor Donovan. The one most people are whispering about is Trevor – the hottie who previously did a nude photo shoot where an alien entered him from behind (something I never get tired of mentioning – or posting). Ironically, the hunky actor/model is featured in this month’s “Cosmo” looking more gorgeous than ever and showing oodles of skin. See what all the fuss is about on BillyMasters.com.

Back in 2008, jewelry was stolen from the home of the legendary Julie Newmar. She reported the theft but no one could figure out how the caper occurred. Cops couldn’t crack the case, but Catwoman could. As luck would have it, a year later Newmar was surfing the web and came across the missing jewels for sale on eBay. Her baubles were being sold by a pawn shop in Illinois. Julie alerted the authorities and they learned that the pawn shop received the ill-gotten goods from one of Julie’s former acquaintances. See? Timing. The man was arrested and charged with grand theft. This past week a plea was reached, so the thief will get three years’ probation and 45 days of community service. Let that be a lesson to anyone out there thinking of burgling the lair of the Catwoman (which would be a great title for a movie).

The case of a high school girl trying to extort $680K out of John Stamos has hit the courts. The incident happened in 2004, when Stamos was in Orlando – allegedly heartbroken over his split with Rebecca Romijn. While at a bar, he met a blonde girl named Allison who was on spring break. According to Allison, she and a female friend went back to John’s hotel with him. She claims he ordered her a drink, even though she told him she was only 17 years old. Allegedly, two female strippers later turned up with a bag of cocaine. Allison claims she took a photo of Stamos bending over a table laden with drugs – although no photo has surfaced. The duo then got into a hot tub, where John allegedly offered to perform oral sex on Allison – an offer she declined. Stop right there – red flag alert! How many women turn down oral sex? None – that’s how many. She claims they didn’t have sex, but she did spend the night cuddling with him (red flag number two – it’s John Stamos, for God’s sake). Later Allison allegedly teamed up with a male friend and tried to get John to pay money in exchange for the incriminating photo. Her story was full of holes, so to speak, and the jury wasted no time in finding Allison and her co-conspirator guilty. They’re facing up to five years in prison. For the record, John says, “There was no hot tub, no drugs, no nudity and nothing sexual in nature involved in my friendship with this woman.” So there.

Anderson Cooper and his beau, Benjamin Maisani, have been more and more visible. The duo previously popped up in pics strolling together during a German vacation. Earlier this month, the pair went public domestically with a trip a deux to the très gay David Barton Gym in matching tight black Ts (from the photos, I think it was “arm day”). They then tooled around the city on mountain bikes – with nary a mountain in sight, but why quibble? And, yes, I’ll run the sexy pics – as if you had to ask.

Little Daniel Radcliffe says he’s hopelessly out of touch with pop culture. “I only heard Justin Bieber for the first time two weeks ago. I genuinely thought it was a woman singing.” It wouldn’t clear things up if you saw him in person, Danny!

Our “Ask Billy” question is from Randy in Dallas: “Thanks for the heads up on Ronnie Kroell. I am completely in love with him. Is it just me, or do the photos in ‘Playgirl’ look…uh….’digitally enhanced’?”

That’s something many people have been debating ever since the “fully aroused” photos were published in “Playgirl”. In some snaps, it does indeed appear that more than on-set fluffing was employed to achieve such impressive results. I did a bit of digging and came up with a conclusive way to answer this – well, there’s another way, but I’ve been out of the country. I’ve unearthed some raw, unedited film footage from the shoot which should answer every question once and for all. It’s explicit, hot, and available only at BillyMasters.com.

When I’m going undercover with a “Playgirl” centerfold, it’s definitely time for me to thank God for this job and end yet another column. See? I was in the right place at the right time. And talking about timing – a couple of weeks ago, a lesbian was mistaken for Justin Bieber. This week, Bieber is mistaken for a woman! Of course, it’s always the perfect time to check out BillyMasters.com. For a good time (or the answer to a question), feel free to send an e-mail me to at Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before someone develops “CSI: Catwoman”! So, until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.



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