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“I remember when I was a kid I got into an argument with my mom and dad and I ran to my room and was like, ‘I’m going to my room because the only friends I have are stuffed and on my bed.” – Jesse Tyler Ferguson reveals he’s always had a flair for the dramatic. I remember having some friends who were stuffed on my bed, but that’s another story.

Hollywood_48_01“I remember when I was a kid I got into an argument with my mom and dad and I ran to my room and was like, ‘I’m going to my room because the only friends I have are stuffed and on my bed.'” – Jesse Tyler Ferguson reveals he’s always had a flair for the dramatic. I remember having some friends who were stuffed on my bed, but that’s another story.

Barbra Streisand and Bette Midler – together. Yes, our two divine divas made a rare joint appearance…kinda. The setting was Philadelphia. The event was the opening of the National Museum of American Jewish History. Jerry Seinfeld hosted. Babs was honored. She looked quite stunning with her long, straight hair (she looked eerily similar to the cover from “Live Concert at the Forum” – no small feat since that was in 1972). Bette sang a medley of songs by Jewish composers and lyricists. Fine. What everyone wanted was a photo of the two gals – together. While they graciously posed for the paps, they stayed on separate sides of the room. Leave it to Seinfeld to corral the pair for a photo op – positioning himself front and center, of course (I’m told one of them was less than eager to be in a photo à deux – the one who folded her arms defiantly). We’ll run the pic on BillyMasters.com

Our favorite elf, Leslie Jordan, has put together a special holiday show and is taking it on the road. “Deck Them Halls Y’All!” will hit San Diego, Orlando, Fort Lauderdale, Atlanta and Los Angeles – specific details can be found on his website, TheLeslieJordan.com. Unlike most of Leslie’s shows which are autobiographical, this one will feature a variety of characters sharing their holiday memories – both positive and poignant. I’m told there will be songs, dance, and costumes – “Honey, it is a dog and pony show!” Wow, a real pony? Probably not, but I’ll still go to the December 5th show at the Broward Center for the Performing Arts in Fort Lauderdale. See ya there.

Filming has begun on the latest installment of “The Real World” franchise – appropriately titled “The Real World: Back to Las Vegas”. The new cast includes Dustin Zito, who has worked under the name Spencer for FratPad.com, an online porn site that features (again, in their own words) “fratmen and straight frat boys in sizzling hot chat and webcam shows.” In other words, they have sex with each other, but in a straight, manly kinda way. Zito is a 24-year-old graduate of Lamar University. He was open about his previous employment and the producers had no problem with that – as long as the adult content was scrubbed from the Internet. Apparently nobody checked with moi since I’ve got oodles and oodles of material. About seven inches of it (OK, maybe eight). All on BillyMasters.com

I just spent a lovely afternoon with Jake Gyllenhaal at “A Little Night Music” on Broadway (more about that in next week’s column). According to reports, he filmed quite a number of nude scenes for “Love and Other Drugs.” Jakey says, “I was naked a lot in the movie. I was naked in more of it than was even in the final cut. A director’s cut? I don’t even know how that would be rated.” For those of you who aren’t rushing to see the flick when it opens on November 24th, you now have something to look forward to on the DVD release.

Someone else who’s gonna be naked on the 24th is “Twilight” hottie Cam Gigandet. He’s part of “Burlesque” and the gals aren’t the only ones who’ll be stripping in that flick. He plays Christina Aguilera’s love interest and does a striptease for the sultry songstress. When asked how he was convinced to do the scene, he laughed and said, “All they had to do was ask.” OK, I’m asking… Anyway, back to the scene. I’m told he’s fully nude – no sock or other flesh-toned apparel was employed. The way it was shot, you can see virtually everything – and if I’ve taught you nothing else, you should know that “virtually everything” = “no penis.” In this instance, we have to thank a strategically placed box of Famous Amos cookies. “I don’t think I’ll be eating them for a while,” says Cam.

In a non-nudity-related “Ask Billy” question, Patrick in Dallas writes: “I heard that Kathy Griffin’s show may not come back to Bravo. Is that true? Why?” It’s been a tense situation doing “My Life on the D List.” Kathy has quite a number of restrictions regarding what she can and cannot do, and who she can and cannot mention. Also, many gigs she’s done have not allowed the Bravo team to film, which led to the last two seasons being over-filled with staged events just for the sake of being funny. And Kat ain’t happy. What she’s proposing is a scripted sitcom based on her life – much like “Curb Your Enthusiasm.” “I could have someone play my mom because she’s a legend at this point. I do feel like it is a natural progression to take all the wacky things that happen to me. But some things can’t be on the reality show because of legal issues and clearances. I think it could be even funnier because it is still real if there was nothing that was off limits.” While this idea continues to evolve, she will continue doing stand-up around the country and Bravo is committed to airing at least one special a year.

When I’m fantasizing about what flavor cookies were covering Cam’s goodies (I’m thinking cream filled), it’s definitely time to end yet another column. Since we just celebrated Thanksgiving, let me take a moment to thank all of you who read this column and check out BillyMasters.com each and every week. It was just pointed out to me that I recently celebrated 15 years of keeping you entertained – at least in print. Some days, it feels like this all started yesterday. And other days, it seems like it’s been forever! But it won’t take that long for me to respond to your e-mails. So if you’ve got a question, send a note to Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before Bette and Babs battle over the drumstick! Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

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