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Hey Woody,

It seems (for the money, status or attractiveness) that most guys in their 20s prefer guys in their 30s or older. I’m in my mid-20s and want to hook up with people my own age but the mother f**kers pay me no attention. What can I do to attract men from my same age?

– Ageless & Evergreen


Hey Woody,

It seems (for the money, status or attractiveness) that most guys in their 20s prefer guys in their 30s or older. I’m in my mid-20s and want to hook up with people my own age but the mother f**kers pay me no attention. What can I do to attract men from my same age?

– Ageless & Evergreen

Dear Ageless,

You think most young guys are into older guys? I don’t know what planet you’re living on, but you must have hitched a ride on the Space Shuttle to get there. Or you entered some time portal that put you in Greece about 2,500 years ago. The norm back then was for younger guys to hook up with older guys because that’s how they learned to hunt, fish, and fight. And, well, give blowjobs that’d make their dads proud.

But I digress. Fast forward to your computer to see how things have changed. Point your browser to any date site and take a look at the profiles. How many 20-somethings say “Older only?” Probably about five percent.

So why are you missing out on the other 95%? I’d guess it’s because you’re such a jerk that even your smooth skin and unlined face scares the hell out of people your own age. I mean, calling the guys you’re attracted to “mother f**kers?” I’d hate to hear how you describe guys you’re NOT attracted to.

You need to do a little self-inventory. If you could be aware of how you’re coming across to people you’d have a great shot at changing it so you can attract the guys you want. The trick to de-jerking yourself is finding out what unconscious behaviors are making guys your age invest in jet propulsion mechanisms to get the hell out of your way faster.

The best way to do that is to ask a good friend how you come across to guys you slobber over. If he’s any good he’ll tell you the truth and if you’re the typical friend you’ll think he’s lying. For instance, a friend asked me how he was coming across to potential dates. I looked at all the different colored hair in his living room and said, “I think if you stopped grabbing their hair thug-style you might have better luck.” He didn’t speak to me for a week.

Hey Woody,

How do I get my boyfriend to get into foreplay? He just tells me to get on my stomach and tops me for 2 minutes and that’s it. I’m not kidding.

– Gagging for more

Dear Gagging:

You’re such a doormat even your email looked like someone wiped their feet on it. Get a grip, grow a spine, or inflate your balls, but do something to assert yourself! You’re not being victimized by bad sex; you’re volunteering for it. So stop it.

Here’s how: *Before* you get into bed say these words, “I want to experience you sexually in different ways. I’d like to try Fill-In-The-Blank. Be specific. Don’t fall into the “Psychic Sex” trap where you think he should read your mind and know what you want.

Having A Hard Time Finding A Date Online? Download woody’s new ebook, Attract Hotter Guys ONLINE

Sweating Too Much

Hey Woody,

I read your answer to “smelly” (how to tell your new boyfriend his crotch smells like a grease-encrusted vomit bucket). Loved your answer but wanted to add a different dimension to the problem. I’m one of those guys who smell down there because I sweat so much. It’s very embarrassing. It doesn’t take much to soak my shirt. I could be in a mildly warm bar and sweat like I’m a whore in church. Any advice for people like me?

– Spikot

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