“If it is not a choice, if it is not a disease, in the perspective of faith it can only be a gift.”

-Brazilian Bishop ANTONIO CAROS CRUZ SANTOS of Caico.

“I would rather have two sharpened lead pencils shoved in both of my ears rather than hear Luis Fonsi’s Despacito song one more time!”

-RICK RYAN, Fort Lauderdale, on Facebook

“You can’t use the fact that I’m bisexual against me if that’s something I’m proud of. I feel motivated more than scared to share who I am because it makes me feel awesome when someone comes up to me and says that because of me she was able to find the strength to accept herself.”

-LAUREN JAUREQUI, Fifth Harmony singer, in an interview with Seventeen.

“Dear Trump: If all you’re doing with North Korea is a dick measuring contest, rest assured even though Kim Jun Un is Asian, his dick is probably twice the size of yours. You’re welcome, America.”

-BEN JOHANSEN, Orlando, on Facebook

“The extreme media is going to do whatever they can to tear down this president, but as long as the people stand for what they want and what they believe, we are going to keep winning.”

-STEPHEN MILLER, White House adviser, on Fox News.