I recently went through a bad breakup, and realize after years of relationships back to back, that I get severely depressed when I am alone. I have been spending so much time with my friends that I think they are tired of me, and in between that, I have just been meeting random guys just so that I would have someone around. I need to get out of this rut. I have just been so down. Any suggestions?
Sad & Lonely
Dear Sad & Lonely,
I don’t’ think that anyone really likes being alone, but you have to try to see it from a more positive perspective. Sometimes we need to be alone to reflect on our lives, process the information we gather from soul-searching, and use it to evolve. The best you can do in your alone time, is spend time becoming your own best friend, and loving yourself. Take yourself to the movies, treat yourself to dinner, and just pamper yourself. Look in the mirror and talk to the beautiful person staring back at you. I promise the more you do these things, the better you will begin to feel. At some point, you won’t even feel lonely. With self-love, comes confidence, and that is when we are most attractive to ourselves and others.
I have an identical twin brother, and we are both gay. He had a boyfriend, and so do I. Recently we had a dinner party, and everybody got a bit drunk. It was a great time, until I excused myself from the party to head to the bathroom, and saw my twin making out with my boyfriend. At the time, they didn’t see me, but I did address it with my boyfriend who claims that he was drunk and thought it was me. I don’t completely buy that. I don’t know who I should be angrier with, my boyfriend or my twin. What should I do?
Okay. Things do happen, people get drunk and make out. The good thing is that they were not having sex, …I hope. Honestly, your boyfriend, depending on how drunk he was, could have legitimately made a mistake. If you guys are truly identical, then it is a possibility. However, there is no excuse for your twin. I am pretty sure that your boyfriend is not identical to his, so he should know better, drunk or not. This is most definitely something you need to address, because boundaries are important. If you don’t, then the next “oops”, could be much worse. Some guys are into twin fantasies, and if you and your twin and your boyfriend aren’t, and this all makes you uncomfortable, you must deal with it…you have every right. Best of luck!